TOP ABSOLVES TOP CONDEMNS
Anonymously Confess Here
I immediately throw resumes in the trash if I see the word "visionary" or "ninja."
  • ABSOLVE : 2110
  • CONDEMN : 121
I submitted the same copy to my boss whenever he wanted it revised and every time he would say "well, this is obviously better than the first one you sent me".
  • ABSOLVE : 1916
  • CONDEMN : 40
After being fired for not working during my Grandfather's funeral, I removed the CSS file for the website I built my former employer's company. They had a big client meeting later that week, I was unavailable by email to restore the site in time. They lost the account.
  • ABSOLVE : 1572
  • CONDEMN : 70
I love to use stock photos of minorities in ad layouts just to watch clients nervously come up with awkward requests for "something different."
  • ABSOLVE : 1571
  • CONDEMN : 33
I purposely ignore any email that says "ASAP" for at least 30 minutes on the principle that whoever uses that acronym needs to calm the fuck down.
  • ABSOLVE : 1565
  • CONDEMN : 74
My job is to convince large corporations to spend hundreds of thousands of dollars producing ideas I thought of while pooping.
  • ABSOLVE : 1431
  • CONDEMN : 37
I took a job out of desperation at a company that does shitty work that I don't believe in and that I am embarrassed to work at. It was supposed to be temporary but I've stayed for 7 years. I am as dead inside as the zombies I work with. My current portfolio and my reputation are a disgrace. At the end of the day I wonder if my life has any meaning, but then I remember that I can feed my family and pay the mortgage this month.
  • ABSOLVE : 1378
  • CONDEMN : 167
I hide a cock drawing in every design I create.
  • ABSOLVE : 1252
  • CONDEMN : 105
I'm really not too busy, I just don't want to design your kids birthday invitation, your wedding invitation, your husband's company logo, your blog page layout, or any other stupid crap that you've hit me up to do for free because I'm your friend/relative. I smile and nod and say if only I had the time, when the truth is I'm thinking you're a fucking freeloader who has no idea how much time and effort it takes to make something creative. Please refer to my hourly rate on the attached invoice, thanks.
  • ABSOLVE : 1249
  • CONDEMN : 60
I always have a random Word document open, which I immediately switch to when someone walks by, just so they don't catch me watching cat videos.
  • ABSOLVE : 1192
  • CONDEMN : 125
I play at work and work at home.
  • ABSOLVE : 1174
  • CONDEMN : 65
I take home left over food from client meetings to feed my family.
  • ABSOLVE : 1161
  • CONDEMN : 41
I wear headphones even when I'm not listening to anything so people won't bother me.
  • ABSOLVE : 1135
  • CONDEMN : 27
I think anyone who uses "bandwidth" to describe how busy they are is an asshole.
  • ABSOLVE : 1092
  • CONDEMN : 78
I despise the middle American, uneducated, unfunny, mom shopper target market we have to dumb down our work for.
  • ABSOLVE : 1059
  • CONDEMN : 119
I don't think I've ever looked back and reread a note I jotted down in my notebook.
  • ABSOLVE : 1049
  • CONDEMN : 74
I can't stand it when my bosses ask me what's on my plate. Just tell me what the fuck you need from me.
  • ABSOLVE : 1000
  • CONDEMN : 25
I purposely wear blue when I'm giving a presentation to Coke.
  • ABSOLVE : 985
  • CONDEMN : 49
No, I don't enjoy designing Wedding Invitations for free.
  • ABSOLVE : 972
  • CONDEMN : 21
A client just asked for scripts with more energy so I replaced all the periods with exclamation marks.
  • ABSOLVE : 953
  • CONDEMN : 40
When I'm bored in meetings I mentally rank the people in the room by the order in which I'd sleep with them. Male/female/young/old/straight/gay: No one is excluded. When I'm done with that I rank them by the order in which I'd kill them and/or eat them if I was trapped in an avalanche without a food source.
  • ABSOLVE : 950
  • CONDEMN : 74
Working as part of the creative staff for a national religious organization has turned me from an agnostic into a full-blown atheist.
  • ABSOLVE : 937
  • CONDEMN : 63
I keep an undated, unsigned resignation letter in my top desk drawer. It helps me get through the day.
  • ABSOLVE : 921
  • CONDEMN : 16
When someone comes up to me while I'm eating lunch (to ask for something stupid), I shove more food in my mouth and chew slowly to make things awkward.
  • ABSOLVE : 869
  • CONDEMN : 24
I'm in charge of making travel arrangements for upper management - if you piss me off, you will have a 7 hour layover, drive a geo metro and stay at the shittiest hotel I can find...I promise!
  • ABSOLVE : 844
  • CONDEMN : 85
I'm graduating college this May and am now reconsidering my career path because of everything I'm reading on here... Is it really that terrible?
  • ABSOLVE : 841
  • CONDEMN : 95
I'm high at work... every day.
  • ABSOLVE : 839
  • CONDEMN : 578
I use periods (.) instead of dashes (-) for phone numbers because I'm convinced it looks better.
  • ABSOLVE : 835
  • CONDEMN : 81
The massively egotistical real estate developer client asked to have the logo bigger -- which, of course, is his last name. So I turned it on its side, vertically, and bled it off 3 sides of the pages, just to be a sarcastic dick. The client thought I was a genius.
  • ABSOLVE : 823
  • CONDEMN : 16
I sometimes book a metting room for myself to have a nap.
  • ABSOLVE : 822
  • CONDEMN : 123
i defriended our social media strategist
  • ABSOLVE : 812
  • CONDEMN : 17
After I graduated I met with the ECD at my dream agency. After I showed him my work he proceeded to hit on me THEN tell me my work wasn't good enough to even intern for him. Now I have my own agency.
  • ABSOLVE : 806
  • CONDEMN : 14
I hide foul words in ad copy to test the proofreaders.
  • ABSOLVE : 781
  • CONDEMN : 46
I'm on a conference call right now and have replied "yes" to 3 questions but have no idea what I was asked because I'm reading Creative Confessionals.
  • ABSOLVE : 777
  • CONDEMN : 56
I made 3 campaigns that had pirates as a key creative element to see if I could.
  • ABSOLVE : 773
  • CONDEMN : 37
I steal snacks from the cooler in the lunch room without putting my pay share in the "envelope". You already pay me $10/hr less than everyone else, so fuck you, these yogurts are mine.
  • ABSOLVE : 750
  • CONDEMN : 110
My CD told me I needed to "live the brand", so I came in the next day dressed like a burrito
  • ABSOLVE : 747
  • CONDEMN : 20
ASAP is not a deadline.
  • ABSOLVE : 746
  • CONDEMN : 19
I charge friends for design work.
  • ABSOLVE : 733
  • CONDEMN : 65
I test editors by writing "Pubic Relations" instead of Public Relations. Few have caught it.
  • ABSOLVE : 728
  • CONDEMN : 19
The client wanted a bigger logo. So I made it 10% bigger. They still wanted it bigger. I made it 200% to prove a point. The ad ran.
  • ABSOLVE : 716
  • CONDEMN : 26
I feel guilty leaving work at 6pm like a normal person.
  • ABSOLVE : 712
  • CONDEMN : 65
I'm a freelancer. When a client is mean, irrational, or just generally irritates me, I charge them an additional hour. I call it the asshole tax.
  • ABSOLVE : 712
  • CONDEMN : 13
I hate MAC and I think MAC users are snobby, they think they look so cool with their MACs and I just think they are plain stupid. I work on a PC and I think my work is as good as theirs, if not better...
  • ABSOLVE : 710
  • CONDEMN : 870
I love coming out to my dickbag coworkers immediately after they make a series of homophobic 'jokes.' I hate how many opportunities I get to do that in this industry.
  • ABSOLVE : 704
  • CONDEMN : 40
I was commissioned to work on a Jingle and I possibly made the best track i've ever written. Once it was finished they only kept the Chorus. So, before sending it to master I recording one of my farts, pitched it up and blended it with the snare sound. It's on TV now!
  • ABSOLVE : 704
  • CONDEMN : 20
I hate doing ".PSD to .JPEG" favors.
  • ABSOLVE : 692
  • CONDEMN : 11
I think 90% of male agency executives are fucking creepy and need to stop looking at my chest.
  • ABSOLVE : 691
  • CONDEMN : 162
I deleted all of the original and ready to print files I had done in my last job when they unjustly fired me, there was no backup.
  • ABSOLVE : 681
  • CONDEMN : 66
I told my employer I needed a subscription to Rolling Stone for reference material, then changed the mailing address to my home before I left the agency.
  • ABSOLVE : 674
  • CONDEMN : 87
I didn't break up with my girlfriend because she cheated on me, I broke up with her because she liked Comic Sans.
  • ABSOLVE : 661
  • CONDEMN : 162
I condemn anyone who schedules a brainstorm early in the morning, then complains we had no good ideas from the brainstorm.
  • ABSOLVE : 660
  • CONDEMN : 19
My favorite work activity is putting music worms in my associate's heads by softly humming annoying songs.
  • ABSOLVE : 655
  • CONDEMN : 84
I've done copywriting for a tobacco company, alcohol brands and a few casinos. My puns have destroyed lives.
  • ABSOLVE : 653
  • CONDEMN : 336
Everybody thinks I have a great plan for my life and business but I really have no idea what I'm doing and sometimes I don't want to leave my bed because I'm terrified of the real world
  • ABSOLVE : 644
  • CONDEMN : 24
I haven't checked the voicemail on my work phone once in the last five years.
  • ABSOLVE : 642
  • CONDEMN : 44
Advertising is to real creativity what porn is to real cinema.
  • ABSOLVE : 633
  • CONDEMN : 51
I hate "account executives" - you're a glorified fucking telephone-answerer - you're a SALES person. You don't do squat except re-interpret the client's brief incorrectly and have free lunches and coffees with clients, and get paid waaaay too much fucking money.
  • ABSOLVE : 616
  • CONDEMN : 166
I set up a Wordpress site for a business, who then stiffed me. They didn't change the passwords for about 3 days, in which time i directed the "powered by wordpress" link to youporn.
  • ABSOLVE : 612
  • CONDEMN : 20
I try to be polite and talk to the cleaning lady. When she goes on and on about religious rants and how I need to find Jesus in my heart, I pick up my phone and have a fake conversation with my boss who hasn't stepped into the office yet.
  • ABSOLVE : 611
  • CONDEMN : 47
I pronounced Verdana as Veranda for several years.
  • ABSOLVE : 605
  • CONDEMN : 175
Whenever the boss says that his wife has a "great idea" for my current project, I want to set something on fire.
  • ABSOLVE : 604
  • CONDEMN : 7
I made an animated screensaver of my desktop with windows opening and closing and the cursor moving about so I could sleep at my desk without anyone noticing.
  • ABSOLVE : 578
  • CONDEMN : 14
Oh you need this ASAP? Okay, i'll have this back to you as slow as possible. Stay tuned!
  • ABSOLVE : 567
  • CONDEMN : 63
This website is the most interesting thing I've read all day.
  • ABSOLVE : 558
  • CONDEMN : 31
I put Illuminati symbolism in my ads. The clients rarely even spot it but the conspiracy theorists go nuts.
  • ABSOLVE : 556
  • CONDEMN : 13
That client -- who sent my copy back to me in an envelope, which contained only burned ashes when I opened it -- he was right.
  • ABSOLVE : 552
  • CONDEMN : 32
I fucking hate PowerPoint. Keynote should be as free and universal as Canadian healthcare.
  • ABSOLVE : 549
  • CONDEMN : 36
Everyday I go to the end of the Internet and back. Its about a 6 hour trip.
  • ABSOLVE : 545
  • CONDEMN : 31
I condemn any confession with a grammatical error on this site.
  • ABSOLVE : 541
  • CONDEMN : 69
If I hear the words "work" "your" and "magic" in the same sentence I'm going to kill myself
  • ABSOLVE : 538
  • CONDEMN : 32
I sometimes like to confuse the already confused account manager by requesting the clients "high res vector" logo.
  • ABSOLVE : 536
  • CONDEMN : 27
I hate all junior employees who live alone in $2,000/month apartments in Murray Hill, party 5 nights/week, buy designer labels every weekend, take vacations every month and don't have a care in the world because they're living off daddy's credit card.
  • ABSOLVE : 535
  • CONDEMN : 18
This job has ruined my posture.
  • ABSOLVE : 534
  • CONDEMN : 25
"Approved" is the sweetest word I'll ever hear.
  • ABSOLVE : 533
  • CONDEMN : 16
I've been a designer for 12 years, and I've never, ever, paid for a typeface.
  • ABSOLVE : 533
  • CONDEMN : 123
I'm the one who broke the color printer. Printing a freelance job. On company time.
  • ABSOLVE : 529
  • CONDEMN : 80
I actually really, really love my job.
  • ABSOLVE : 526
  • CONDEMN : 126
I think MS Publisher should be outlawed.
  • ABSOLVE : 523
  • CONDEMN : 25
I'm 58
  • ABSOLVE : 509
  • CONDEMN : 83
I miss art directors who can draw, typewriters, correction fluid and phones plugged into the wall. I miss the big Xerox and the sweet, wonderful smell of spray mount. I miss studio skills and ragging type til 1 am. I pine for the days when advertising was still a craft and not the last stop for all thumbs video game rejects.
  • ABSOLVE : 508
  • CONDEMN : 79
When a client asks for a powerpoint template to look "MORE EXCITING!" I add a swoosh. Works like a charm. #powerpointkillsmysoul
  • ABSOLVE : 501
  • CONDEMN : 8
In presentations to CDs, I always volunteer to go first, so if another team has the same idea as us, they won't be able to claim it.
  • ABSOLVE : 498
  • CONDEMN : 22
My boss linked his email account to the company testing iPad and forgot to remove it. Reading his email has given me significant advantages in corporate politics ever since.
  • ABSOLVE : 492
  • CONDEMN : 31
I got drunk at a company dinner and told our German owners that advertising featuring all-white, blond, blue-eyed people wouldn't fly in the states. They didn't get it, but the wine was top-notch.
  • ABSOLVE : 488
  • CONDEMN : 27
Me and a team of ten basically sold a .JPG to a corporation for $50,000.00
  • ABSOLVE : 487
  • CONDEMN : 23
I farted in my hand right before politely greeting the client from hell.
  • ABSOLVE : 487
  • CONDEMN : 33
I spend 50% of my time working, and 50% of my time browsing iTunes trying to find the perfect music to work to.
  • ABSOLVE : 476
  • CONDEMN : 41
I made my intern hand deliver an "important package" to a client that I was dating: a mix CD.
  • ABSOLVE : 474
  • CONDEMN : 447
I made the best logo I've ever designed, but the client bought my partner's crappy first-thought concept, and now I'm just sleepwalking through the rest of the project.
  • ABSOLVE : 473
  • CONDEMN : 19
I gave my coworkers a fake Facebook and Twitter account to appease their curiosity while maintaining my privacy.
  • ABSOLVE : 462
  • CONDEMN : 7
I don't know how to make it "Pop"
  • ABSOLVE : 458
  • CONDEMN : 9
Since my coke whore CD will leave at 3:00pm for her manicure and call a creative meeting when she returns at 7, I do nothing but surf the Internet while she's gone...
  • ABSOLVE : 457
  • CONDEMN : 16
I took another job to get out of submitting 5 months of time sheets.
  • ABSOLVE : 457
  • CONDEMN : 32
Even though he was a hack and I never liked him, I went to a Senior Vice President's funeral just for a free half day off.
  • ABSOLVE : 452
  • CONDEMN : 99
When I found this site I pictured all of us frolicking together through a meadow of dismembered executives with Julie Andrews singing atop a pile skulls.
  • ABSOLVE : 450
  • CONDEMN : 8
I told my underlings that Cooper Black is my favorite font, just to see how often they would use it.
  • ABSOLVE : 447
  • CONDEMN : 24
I get significantly more validation from things that mock our industry than I do from the industry itself.
  • ABSOLVE : 444
  • CONDEMN : 6
I've worked in design for ten years and am at the top of my game and have realised it's all pointless and would rather have done woodwork or something.
  • ABSOLVE : 443
  • CONDEMN : 24
I've been fired from 2 agencies and am now $10,000 in debt and on the verge of bankruptcy because of it. I get up every day and continue to try harder than ever just to prove those asswads that fired me wrong.
  • ABSOLVE : 440
  • CONDEMN : 18
I drink the fancy sparkling water from the fridge that is suppose to be for clients only.
  • ABSOLVE : 438
  • CONDEMN : 9
I hate doing design "favors". Of any kind. Pay me.
  • ABSOLVE : 438
  • CONDEMN : 13
When the network closed my office, I forgot to return two desktop towers, a laptop, scanner, the studio light box, 2 keyboards, 2 mice and a Wacom tablet.
  • ABSOLVE : 436
  • CONDEMN : 53
I pretend I'm super busy all the time, so I don't have to help other people who are actually super busy.
  • ABSOLVE : 436
  • CONDEMN : 474
I use "vectors" as my one-word-excuse for procrastinating on work, because no one has ever challenged me on it.
  • ABSOLVE : 436
  • CONDEMN : 20
I'm resigning this week.
  • ABSOLVE : 436
  • CONDEMN : 5
I sit in brainstorms and marvel over how much everyone loves the sound of their own voices.
  • ABSOLVE : 436
  • CONDEMN : 2
I can't bear accepting another tobacco/pharma/fast food client, but I do it, because it secures the jobs of my employees.
  • ABSOLVE : 434
  • CONDEMN : 23
When I'm sitting at a bar by myself, I'll sometimes order a Scotch on the rocks just so when I tell a stranger that I'm in advertising, it paints a complete picture.
  • ABSOLVE : 433
  • CONDEMN : 19
No coffee, no copy...
  • ABSOLVE : 430
  • CONDEMN : 42
I have to constantly remind myself, "It's JUST advertising. We aren't saving the world." Everyone else freaking out about a banner ad needs to calm the hell down and tell themselves the same.
  • ABSOLVE : 428
  • CONDEMN : 9
I am a CD and partner making almost 100k a year at a boutique shop. I'm 23 and have no idea what I'm doing.
  • ABSOLVE : 428
  • CONDEMN : 243
It's so liberating to hit the age when you honestly don't give a flying fuck what others think of you.
  • ABSOLVE : 426
  • CONDEMN : 6
I believe that "focus group" consumer research is complete bullshit.
  • ABSOLVE : 425
  • CONDEMN : 41
I did what the client wanted so I wouldn't have to work the weekend.
  • ABSOLVE : 424
  • CONDEMN : 17
I sent an anonymous email to Lululemon letting them know my company purposely knocks off their designs. I got an email back from them saying they'd look into the matter.
  • ABSOLVE : 422
  • CONDEMN : 47
People who rant and rave about Comic Sans bore me more than the font itself.
  • ABSOLVE : 421
  • CONDEMN : 48
I once deleted an "r" from a word in a layout... and no one caught it before it left the agency. The client was not amused to read about the risks of "beast cancer."
  • ABSOLVE : 418
  • CONDEMN : 54
Advertising is a joke with no punchline.
  • ABSOLVE : 417
  • CONDEMN : 21
Even my best work embarrasses me.
  • ABSOLVE : 401
  • CONDEMN : 18
when in meetings my eyes often scan the room for items light enough to pick up and throw, yet heavy enough to do serious damage
  • ABSOLVE : 400
  • CONDEMN : 32
The more people you cc on an email, the bigger the asshole I think you are.
  • ABSOLVE : 398
  • CONDEMN : 18
I love being an art director and don't want to be a creative director. But at 41, I wonder how many years I have left as an art director before I look like a slacker and/or am completely irrelevant.
  • ABSOLVE : 398
  • CONDEMN : 19
I wish Power Point would just shrivel up and die.
  • ABSOLVE : 397
  • CONDEMN : 12
If you use the phrase "at the end of the day" and fail to complete it with either "it gets dark" or "I go to sleep," I'm going to cram you into the box that you want me to think outside of.
  • ABSOLVE : 397
  • CONDEMN : 25
I have had 3 sex dreams about my boss and I'm not even the least bit attracted to him. Now when he asks where a report is that was due I get all flustered and flushed so it looks like I'm lying when all I am really trying to do is not picture him banging me from behind.
  • ABSOLVE : 393
  • CONDEMN : 47
Being a copywriter is turning me into a shitty writer.
  • ABSOLVE : 392
  • CONDEMN : 26
Sometimes I destroy a meeting by bringing up religion or politics.
  • ABSOLVE : 390
  • CONDEMN : 117
I fucking hate advertising.
  • ABSOLVE : 390
  • CONDEMN : 37
The best part of my day is when I take a 45minute shit in the handicap stall, browsing facebook on my phone.
  • ABSOLVE : 386
  • CONDEMN : 70
i hate when people say, "carve out some time." today i said it. it's like that moment when you realize you're becoming your mother. but at work.
  • ABSOLVE : 384
  • CONDEMN : 41
I only charge hourly rates when freelancing. For every mind-numbingly, micro-managed, self-talking, spineless, idiotic change I make is another smile on my walk to the bank.
  • ABSOLVE : 384
  • CONDEMN : 14
I can't call myself a writer anymore. I am just a content mill for brands I don't believe in, in an industry I find vacuous and unfulfilling.
  • ABSOLVE : 383
  • CONDEMN : 21
I only wear a watch to work to bitterly look at it when people ask me for a favor
  • ABSOLVE : 382
  • CONDEMN : 71
As a freelancer, I often turn down work because I'm going out of town, have a social engagement, or am just to lazy to wake up before noon. I never tell them this, I just say I'm booked. Also, I never take work right away, I say "let me see if I can move some stuff around, I'll call you right back" then I watch hulu/check email/masturbate for 30 minutes, then call back and take the job, while implying they owe me a favor for making room in my busy, busy schedule. Since I started doing this, my business has tripled.
  • ABSOLVE : 381
  • CONDEMN : 20
I always use Comic Sans for periods in EVERYTHING I HAVE EVER DONE.
  • ABSOLVE : 379
  • CONDEMN : 120
I prefer the Oxford comma. And judge other people when they don't use one.
  • ABSOLVE : 375
  • CONDEMN : 80
I got a SVP drunk and got her to take off all her clothes and blow me, and caught a ride to work with her the next day.
  • ABSOLVE : 375
  • CONDEMN : 565
From a job where we had remote access to the printers in other offices, I would randomly printout porn in Seattle, Portland, Chicago, San Fran, etc. from the freelancer's desk here in NYC.
  • ABSOLVE : 375
  • CONDEMN : 47
I hate designers who think they're cool because they wear Ray-Ban sunglasses and have iphones in their pockets.
  • ABSOLVE : 373
  • CONDEMN : 32
Occasionally I take a logo that is 72dpi and change the resolution to 300dpi for small print ads.
  • ABSOLVE : 372
  • CONDEMN : 130
Actually, I really don't give a shit whether your product sells or not.
  • ABSOLVE : 371
  • CONDEMN : 29
I don't care how much 'experience' my boss has. A creative director with no grasp on digital should just get out now.
  • ABSOLVE : 370
  • CONDEMN : 26
I've been using the same half-typed Word document to pretend I'm doing work for years now and no one's noticed.
  • ABSOLVE : 368
  • CONDEMN : 18
I want to work at Buzzfeed. I'd rather make lists about the 90s than write ads about tacos.
  • ABSOLVE : 367
  • CONDEMN : 10
I would never date a fellow creative if they have shitty work.
  • ABSOLVE : 366
  • CONDEMN : 22
I stopped caring about how I dressed at work once I learned that all the hot girls are either pregnant, married, have boyfriends, or are psychos.
  • ABSOLVE : 365
  • CONDEMN : 68
My boss acuses me of writing half the posts on here.
  • ABSOLVE : 363
  • CONDEMN : 11
I open every sponsored ad I see in hopes that each click is costing someone money. I never actually look at the page.
  • ABSOLVE : 362
  • CONDEMN : 10
Client sent me a screenshot with a "problem" with their website while being viewed in IE6. In a separate tab there is a Yahoo search for "how to take a screenshot".
  • ABSOLVE : 361
  • CONDEMN : 13
Ugly babies make me sad. :(
  • ABSOLVE : 358
  • CONDEMN : 80
I hid human feces in a retouch of a extremely well-known product that has chocolate on it.
  • ABSOLVE : 356
  • CONDEMN : 50
I stick my tongue out like Michael Jordan when I'm designing.
  • ABSOLVE : 354
  • CONDEMN : 35
We use Blackberries only when we're meeting with the Blackberry client.
  • ABSOLVE : 354
  • CONDEMN : 13
I accept Facebook friend requests from coworkers, then block them from seeing any of my status updates.
  • ABSOLVE : 353
  • CONDEMN : 2
I respond to briefs In Haiku. Only this way can inner peace come.
  • ABSOLVE : 350
  • CONDEMN : 26
I mentally face-punch people when they launch initiatives with no thought regarding what it will take to launch the initiative. "We'll figure it out as we go along..."
  • ABSOLVE : 348
  • CONDEMN : 18
I'm repulsed by those who believe that we emit creative juices and that their uninspired brief can get them flowing.
  • ABSOLVE : 348
  • CONDEMN : 6
Every week I tell myself I will finish my portfolio and find an new job... its been a year now
  • ABSOLVE : 347
  • CONDEMN : 112
In my heart, I feel like nothing we do is effective. We're just talking to each other.
  • ABSOLVE : 347
  • CONDEMN : 7
I hold on to my best ideas because I know the creative director will kill everything up until the last possible minute.
  • ABSOLVE : 346
  • CONDEMN : 3
Any email by a PM in all caps is immediately ignored until after lunch.
  • ABSOLVE : 346
  • CONDEMN : 14
Proofreaders, I love you.
  • ABSOLVE : 345
  • CONDEMN : 12
When I say I can work from home, I mean to say that I work from home only after I've put a solid 6 hours into Skyrim.
  • ABSOLVE : 344
  • CONDEMN : 71
I'm a senior designer at a top 5 agency and I still can't Photoshop hair
  • ABSOLVE : 344
  • CONDEMN : 114
My partners think I'm asking for clarification while concepting but, really, I'm using the Socratic Method on them so they shut down their own bad ideas.
  • ABSOLVE : 343
  • CONDEMN : 9
anytime anyone suggests that I just have "FUN WITH IT" I want to give them a cock-punch.
  • ABSOLVE : 341
  • CONDEMN : 2
Art directors don't read copy before sending it across. And I have deliberately left typos to expose their inability.
  • ABSOLVE : 339
  • CONDEMN : 110
I call a cocky junior art director the wrong name on purpose to put him in his place.
  • ABSOLVE : 339
  • CONDEMN : 28
I say I can't go to lunch because I don't want to break my flow. In reality, I haven't been anywhere near able to afford lunch since I got my creative dream job.
  • ABSOLVE : 339
  • CONDEMN : 1
I go weeks without buying lunch simply by stalking the conference room calendars.
  • ABSOLVE : 339
  • CONDEMN : 16
Last Christmas, I gave a Senior VP a bottle of scotch I expensed on a shoot earlier in the month...
  • ABSOLVE : 339
  • CONDEMN : 10
As a graphic designer, I am constantly asked to essentially bake an apple pie with either no ingredients, or with ingredients for a Boston Cream. I can't make a 6 page program brochure with 1/3 of the speakers, 1/6 of bios, no headshots, no sponsor logos, and no topics.
  • ABSOLVE : 339
  • CONDEMN : 16
I tripled my hourly rate on a bid for a potential client based on the mere fact that their logo was in papyrus.
  • ABSOLVE : 339
  • CONDEMN : 16
The only reason I work in this industry everyday is to save up enough money to quit. I will savor the moment that day comes.
  • ABSOLVE : 337
  • CONDEMN : 27
I didn't vote for Barack Obama.
  • ABSOLVE : 337
  • CONDEMN : 354
110% makes no sense.
  • ABSOLVE : 337
  • CONDEMN : 9
Twice I have used obscure music found on female co-workers iTunes shared libraries as a discussion point, and both times the conversation has moved to the bar down the street. Both times it's gotten me laid. I'm a closeted lesbian. One of my targets is married and the other had a boyfriend at the time.
  • ABSOLVE : 335
  • CONDEMN : 291
I hate Wes Anderson movies.
  • ABSOLVE : 335
  • CONDEMN : 323
I'm tempted to make a fake email address only to tell a certain agency how much I hate their flash website. Update that shit please.
  • ABSOLVE : 334
  • CONDEMN : 14
I have a high IQ but never tell anyone because I don't want to have to live up to their expectations.
  • ABSOLVE : 333
  • CONDEMN : 17
I was assigned to write copy for a website catering to expectant mothers. Instead, I spent the day writing a series of "You so pregnant" jokes.
  • ABSOLVE : 332
  • CONDEMN : 23
I really don't want to move to NYC for work.
  • ABSOLVE : 332
  • CONDEMN : 25
I actually reviewed the portfolio of a girl who did three ads while in design school for the local Humane Society (pet shelter) in which she found the most majestic stock photography of a lion, a giraffe and a zebra. When I asked if she thought I could adopt a zebra at the humane society she looked at me with a blank stare.
  • ABSOLVE : 330
  • CONDEMN : 10
The older I get and the higher I go up, the less I can stand advertising.
  • ABSOLVE : 330
  • CONDEMN : 4
I cry sometimes, because they make me use Power Point.
  • ABSOLVE : 330
  • CONDEMN : 9
Hated the time when a very agitated American client living in London told me I spelt colour incorrectly in his advertising. Then told me I should go back to 'High School' and learn English............
  • ABSOLVE : 328
  • CONDEMN : 52
One time I saw a copywriter's script come out of the printer and I circled all the spelling and grammar mistakes. I'm a designer.
  • ABSOLVE : 327
  • CONDEMN : 13
If a co-worker is finishing their business in a neighboring stall I wait until they leave to come out in order to avoid talking to and/or looking at someone who I know just pooped.
  • ABSOLVE : 322
  • CONDEMN : 6
It's hard for me to take the female AE who spent 30 minutes giving us a butt sex tutorial seriously anymore.
  • ABSOLVE : 322
  • CONDEMN : 35
I billed eight hours to the creative confessional today.
  • ABSOLVE : 322
  • CONDEMN : 24
I throw a quarter in the urinal at least once a week. It disappears within an hour.
  • ABSOLVE : 322
  • CONDEMN : 14
I routinely fight the urge to tell co-workers that their Instagram filters have more talent than they do.
  • ABSOLVE : 322
  • CONDEMN : 2
I think 3D projections are dumb.
  • ABSOLVE : 320
  • CONDEMN : 36
I don't read any confession here that's longer than two lines.
  • ABSOLVE : 320
  • CONDEMN : 34
I can't believe that a client will buy a Hyundai but won't buy my idea.
  • ABSOLVE : 319
  • CONDEMN : 44
I don't believe design can save the world.
  • ABSOLVE : 319
  • CONDEMN : 67
When you use the term "per" as in "per the client's request" or "per our conversation" it makes me hate you.
  • ABSOLVE : 318
  • CONDEMN : 124
If one more person in my office says, "We're just like that show, Mad Men" I'm going to experience projectile vomiting.
  • ABSOLVE : 317
  • CONDEMN : 10
I have a Facebook account for my dog that I use to "like" campaigns & content I produce for them on Facebook.
  • ABSOLVE : 316
  • CONDEMN : 74
Pandora: "Are you still listening?" Me: For fuck sakess yessss, is my computer on? Did I finish my work for the day, close out of photoshop and pack my bags??? Did I Pandora, did I????? Nooooooo.......Sorry had to get that out of my system.
  • ABSOLVE : 316
  • CONDEMN : 27
I want to have sex with my boyfriend in my office. NOW. My goal is by end of February. I'll let you guys know soon :)
  • ABSOLVE : 316
  • CONDEMN : 94
During a creative brief, I once played the "Meow" game with the creative director...for 20 minutes.
  • ABSOLVE : 312
  • CONDEMN : 17
I declined an offer at an in-house agency because I couldn't wear jeans to work.
  • ABSOLVE : 311
  • CONDEMN : 29
I'm lazy
  • ABSOLVE : 305
  • CONDEMN : 81
I'm better at tracing than I am at drawing.
  • ABSOLVE : 304
  • CONDEMN : 69
I actually like Comic Sans.
  • ABSOLVE : 303
  • CONDEMN : 1042
I hate adobe illustrator
  • ABSOLVE : 302
  • CONDEMN : 258
I took a perfectly good 10-year-old table-based website and made it look exactly the same using CSS. And billed 200 hours for it.
  • ABSOLVE : 302
  • CONDEMN : 44
i'm an art director and still use PC instead of MAC!
  • ABSOLVE : 301
  • CONDEMN : 243
Part of me thinks this is a fake site set up by my boss to trick me into revealing my secrets
  • ABSOLVE : 300
  • CONDEMN : 6
I hate cocky creatives. You make ads douche bag, you're not a rockstar.
  • ABSOLVE : 300
  • CONDEMN : 50
I sometimes fantasize of getting fired so it pushes me to go after my dreams...
  • ABSOLVE : 299
  • CONDEMN : 28
I've lied about owning and using a mac to get freelance design jobs from idiots who think that the definition of a good designer is "someone who uses a mac"
  • ABSOLVE : 298
  • CONDEMN : 26
After twenty seven edited versions, I resubmitted the very first draft and you accepted it.
  • ABSOLVE : 296
  • CONDEMN : 2
I really like this page, but I secretly wish it was my idea. Therefore, I have to hate it.
  • ABSOLVE : 295
  • CONDEMN : 20
I write promos for a TV channel I never watch.
  • ABSOLVE : 293
  • CONDEMN : 16
I love writing a second set of lyrics for my songs, usually majorly obscene. I sing it in my mind, while performing the actual lyrics.
  • ABSOLVE : 291
  • CONDEMN : 9
My old boss is named Dick. Every time there was an emergency everyone would run around the office yelling, "Where's Dick?" "I need Dick." "Has anyone seen Dick?" Never gets old. Never.
  • ABSOLVE : 291
  • CONDEMN : 6
When I'm bored with a commercial that I'm editing, I purposely create a version that will get the art director and copywriter fighting with each other.
  • ABSOLVE : 290
  • CONDEMN : 24
I want to break people's fingers when they touch my computer screen.
  • ABSOLVE : 290
  • CONDEMN : 13
I fake my timesheet. Totally. Nothing true at all...
  • ABSOLVE : 289
  • CONDEMN : 35
If I hear augmented reality one more time, I'm going to augment your reality with my f*cking fist.
  • ABSOLVE : 287
  • CONDEMN : 15
I automatically reject anyone who uses the word anyways instead of anyway.
  • ABSOLVE : 286
  • CONDEMN : 29
I print out every inappropriate email sent to me by this one creative director at work. One day, I'll sue.
  • ABSOLVE : 286
  • CONDEMN : 10
I'm a pun loving copywriter.
  • ABSOLVE : 285
  • CONDEMN : 124
My best ideas have been stolen from Dr. Suess. No one seems to know this and believes I am truly original and brilliant.
  • ABSOLVE : 283
  • CONDEMN : 83
I'll never leave advertising only because of how cool it sounds to say "I'm in advertising" to the opposite sex.
  • ABSOLVE : 283
  • CONDEMN : 223
Walk around my office and strike up conversations with people just so I don't have to be at my desk. I really don't care about your kids but please tell me more.
  • ABSOLVE : 283
  • CONDEMN : 50
I'm going to kill someone if I hear "let's make a viral" again.
  • ABSOLVE : 282
  • CONDEMN : 4
When I have to pee and its close to a regularly scheduled break (i.e. lunch) I sometimes wait for hours, just so I don't "waste" my breaks doing bodily functions I could get paid to do, and to maximize the amount of time I can get paid for NOT working, which pretty much defines everything I do at my joke of a job.
  • ABSOLVE : 280
  • CONDEMN : 36
I did work for the republican party. Also, designed a porn website.
  • ABSOLVE : 280
  • CONDEMN : 80
My client is Mcdonald's but i always go to Burger King!
  • ABSOLVE : 279
  • CONDEMN : 14
Once I changed a tampon under my desk because I was trying to hit a deadline.
  • ABSOLVE : 279
  • CONDEMN : 345
I feel like I'll never get paid enough for what I do :(
  • ABSOLVE : 279
  • CONDEMN : 68
Copy was due at 1:00. Finished it at 3:00. Set my computer's clock to 12:56 and then emailed it.
  • ABSOLVE : 278
  • CONDEMN : 11
I don't think Wilco is that great.
  • ABSOLVE : 278
  • CONDEMN : 43
Anyone that sends a web gif when asked for a Hi-res logo/image, should be dragged behind a bus.
  • ABSOLVE : 277
  • CONDEMN : 18
I want to shave the beards of every creative directors that think it's cool to have them... It isn't, you look like a tramp
  • ABSOLVE : 277
  • CONDEMN : 140
I got fired yesterday because I absolutely refused to participate in the filming of my agency's "Harlem Shake" video. And I am proud of myself!
  • ABSOLVE : 277
  • CONDEMN : 11
Why do junior designers think it is ok to send an CV & portfolio through in a word document? DELETE.
  • ABSOLVE : 276
  • CONDEMN : 47
My senile boss is slowly losing her mind because every time she leaves for her lunch break I rearrange her furniture.
  • ABSOLVE : 276
  • CONDEMN : 55
I don't care about awards... I don't care about big ideas.... I don't care about being 'famous'.... I only care about one thing. The Money. Is that wrong?
  • ABSOLVE : 274
  • CONDEMN : 43
I've been working on a blog of weird stock photos found on Shutterstock/iStock during billable hours. I want to name it Shitterstock.
  • ABSOLVE : 274
  • CONDEMN : 5
Freelance Timesheets = How much can I get away with?
  • ABSOLVE : 274
  • CONDEMN : 49
I'm a student and thank you – I'm changing my major.
  • ABSOLVE : 274
  • CONDEMN : 56
I hope no more of my friends get married so I don't have to do another set of wedding stationery for free
  • ABSOLVE : 273
  • CONDEMN : 7
I wish there was a way to vote websites off of the internet... particularly some that i've worked on.
  • ABSOLVE : 273
  • CONDEMN : 3
I went to work one day and thought I was entering Satan's workshop. I ended up concluding that all ad people have no souls.
  • ABSOLVE : 272
  • CONDEMN : 42
Sometimes I go to the bathroom and sit on the toilet just so I can get away.
  • ABSOLVE : 271
  • CONDEMN : 7
I thought I was alone until I read this website.
  • ABSOLVE : 270
  • CONDEMN : 1
If I have to hear one more non-designer make fun of Comic Sans because they think it's cool or new, I will seriously Papyrus their ass.
  • ABSOLVE : 270
  • CONDEMN : 22
I made a twitter account for the response I wish I could give to my bosses.
  • ABSOLVE : 269
  • CONDEMN : 9
I used porn images for 3D terrain maps in a client's campaign.
  • ABSOLVE : 269
  • CONDEMN : 14
I let an account team of two women think I was gay--for a year--because they were into the idea of working with a gay man and it made my job easier.
  • ABSOLVE : 269
  • CONDEMN : 9
I chose the safer concept so I wouldn't have to work this weekend.
  • ABSOLVE : 269
  • CONDEMN : 38
I hate doing work for the AE that can only find time to type "see below" before forwarding her client's email to me.
  • ABSOLVE : 268
  • CONDEMN : 7
i've realized when creative is a business, it stops being creative.
  • ABSOLVE : 268
  • CONDEMN : 10
I think it's hilarious that so many people in advertising condemn cigarette ads but have no problem on doing 5 pounds of coke every night.
  • ABSOLVE : 267
  • CONDEMN : 13
I'm in a meeting about a meeting
  • ABSOLVE : 267
  • CONDEMN : 13
I fully realize that I work for money, in a job, and that I am not an artist, a poet, a "real" writer, or any other substantial creative. I am aware that my entire career is based on selling things. The more my work helps sell things for my clients, the better I am at my job. I do the best I can at work, as anyone should, and go home. I work in pharma because it pays the most, and the things I like in life cost money. I want a nice sized savings account, a good 401k, insurance, and the ability to buy things for myself and my family. Those things make me proud. Not ads for cookies.
  • ABSOLVE : 267
  • CONDEMN : 59
My client likes to mark-up my copy by adding exclamation marks all over it because it sounds 'more friendly' she says. Fucking bitch.
  • ABSOLVE : 266
  • CONDEMN : 11
My partner and I book conference rooms just to talk shit about the people we work with.
  • ABSOLVE : 266
  • CONDEMN : 32
I refrain from friending co-workers on Facebook, so I can complain about them in private.
  • ABSOLVE : 266
  • CONDEMN : 1
I wish I could have read this site 15 years ago so I would now be a happy car mechanic.
  • ABSOLVE : 265
  • CONDEMN : 12
If a coworker sends me an email, and then calls me within 2 minutes to tell me that they sent me an email, I ignore them completely for three hours.
  • ABSOLVE : 265
  • CONDEMN : 6
I'm wearing women's underwear
  • ABSOLVE : 265
  • CONDEMN : 33
I'm quitting in 4 minutes
  • ABSOLVE : 264
  • CONDEMN : 4
I don't think my boss would recognize good typography if it hit him in the face.
  • ABSOLVE : 264
  • CONDEMN : 3
Every day i look for open positions at a different agency
  • ABSOLVE : 262
  • CONDEMN : 10
As a photo editor for a major retail chain, I've deliberately reduced one eye and enlarged one breast on a particular model out of sheer boredom. So far, no one has noticed.
  • ABSOLVE : 261
  • CONDEMN : 11
I'm a "writer" working in advertising. I'm afraid that one day I'll pick up my head, Justin Bieber will be 50, and I'll be getting fired as I finish writing yet another shitty Facebook post for a ham discount or something. My life will have been a waste.
  • ABSOLVE : 261
  • CONDEMN : 12
Sometimes, the client is right.
  • ABSOLVE : 260
  • CONDEMN : 329
I respect the opinion of approximately 20% of the people I work with.
  • ABSOLVE : 259
  • CONDEMN : 10
I miss Spray Mount
  • ABSOLVE : 259
  • CONDEMN : 21
I haven't created anything I'd put in my professional portfolio in 4 years.
  • ABSOLVE : 259
  • CONDEMN : 102
I once told a client that they couldn't use Mickey Mouse plus a picture of a real mouse in the same ad because it was "rodential conflict".
  • ABSOLVE : 259
  • CONDEMN : 3
Once, after a nice lunch, I crashed a media presentation because the room was darkened and the seats were comfortable. I slept for twenty blissful minutes then left.
  • ABSOLVE : 259
  • CONDEMN : 7
I have a secret file of people that don't wash their hands after they use the bathroom.
  • ABSOLVE : 258
  • CONDEMN : 12
I haven't worked past 5:30 in a year.
  • ABSOLVE : 258
  • CONDEMN : 47
Whenever we have to sign company cards for various sick/leaving/baby-new/birthday/rehab colleague situations, I wait for my Art Director to write a carefully considered message and then I surreptitiously add my name to the end of her message. This has been going on for 3 years. She has no idea.
  • ABSOLVE : 257
  • CONDEMN : 42
I don't believe in advertising.
  • ABSOLVE : 256
  • CONDEMN : 25
I hate the logo for this site
  • ABSOLVE : 256
  • CONDEMN : 7
I clicked "absolved" on my own confession.
  • ABSOLVE : 256
  • CONDEMN : 51
I got in at 9am this morning. I'm still procrastinating. It's 2pm. This site hasn't helped.
  • ABSOLVE : 255
  • CONDEMN : 6
I fart a lot in my office
  • ABSOLVE : 255
  • CONDEMN : 87
I'm trying to get famous by opening my website on every computer in every apple store.
  • ABSOLVE : 255
  • CONDEMN : 58
I forgot how to write in cursive. My notes are a mash-up of caps and lowercase chicken scratch. Writing on paper makes my hand hurt.
  • ABSOLVE : 254
  • CONDEMN : 36
My supervisor once spent an hour yelling at me for a problem in a scene that turned out to be his fault. To get back at him I wore low cuts shirts (that make him incredibly uncomfortable) for a week.
  • ABSOLVE : 253
  • CONDEMN : 27
i only work past 6 so I can expense food!
  • ABSOLVE : 252
  • CONDEMN : 17
On a daily basis, I think about quitting my job at my advertising firm in order to pursue my lifelong dream to become a blues singer.
  • ABSOLVE : 252
  • CONDEMN : 21
If I can save time coding and spend more time designing then I don't mind using pre-made script generators and programs.
  • ABSOLVE : 252
  • CONDEMN : 28
I am sick of being a slave to round after round of revisions
  • ABSOLVE : 252
  • CONDEMN : 10
I refuse to listen to The Black Keys because every single person in Chiat Day behaves as if they are in the band
  • ABSOLVE : 251
  • CONDEMN : 29
One of the first things I do when at a new firm is copy over their entire font library for my personal use... And then I stick with the same 10 fonts I've used my entire career.
  • ABSOLVE : 251
  • CONDEMN : 14
I sometimes layout ads in Illustrator. I also slice bread with a hammer and mow my lawn with a coffee maker.
  • ABSOLVE : 251
  • CONDEMN : 28
I hope I'm not the only person who sips wine while working from home.
  • ABSOLVE : 251
  • CONDEMN : 5
I cheat on my Mac by using a PC at home.
  • ABSOLVE : 250
  • CONDEMN : 184
I sold a mediocre painting so I could buy a flat screen.
  • ABSOLVE : 250
  • CONDEMN : 12
My IT guy sells the best weed.
  • ABSOLVE : 248
  • CONDEMN : 22
i really didn't make the logo bigger.
  • ABSOLVE : 248
  • CONDEMN : 3
Sometimes I find a high res photo of Darth Vader online. Then I zoom in about 800% and begin tracing the lines on his mask in Illustrator just so I can look busy when people walk by.
  • ABSOLVE : 247
  • CONDEMN : 19
I am proud to be a lifetime member of the National Rifle Association.
  • ABSOLVE : 247
  • CONDEMN : 389
I think the "design community" is shooting itself in the foot through its celebration of mediocre, trend-based work.
  • ABSOLVE : 246
  • CONDEMN : 8
I've been dating my creative director's daughter for over a year and he still hasn't figured it out.
  • ABSOLVE : 246
  • CONDEMN : 16
I turned down a job once because it seemed like I'd have to get there on time in the morning.
  • ABSOLVE : 246
  • CONDEMN : 23
I freelance because I don't want to wake up before 10 a.m
  • ABSOLVE : 246
  • CONDEMN : 9
I can't abide contrived designers who wear 'arty' or 'ironic' black rim retro glasses, often over-sized. You can try and 'look' creative or whatever that means. Try being creative and use your imagination. There, I've said it. You all know who you are. Zombie sheep.
  • ABSOLVE : 246
  • CONDEMN : 25
Digital strategist? I just like reading stuff on the internet, please leave me alone.
  • ABSOLVE : 246
  • CONDEMN : 29
I borrowed 8 lonely iPads from work for testing. Then I gave them to 8 lonely friends as gifts.
  • ABSOLVE : 246
  • CONDEMN : 664
Sure, I've got passion for my work, and I value determination, and I have very big goals for my career. But nothing I do in my professional life is as GOOD as watching a movie with my wife, my dog, and a joint.
  • ABSOLVE : 245
  • CONDEMN : 4
My CD and ACD browses D&AD journals and tells me, "Yes, that's what we'll do, we'll use the same kind of execution. Now, think of an idea that goes well with that execution". I'm a saint for not having punched their faces yet.
  • ABSOLVE : 244
  • CONDEMN : 19
I hate when my coworkers refer to me as "the designer" like I'm not in the room with them.
  • ABSOLVE : 242
  • CONDEMN : 17
I die a little inside whenever I hear "creative" used as a noun.
  • ABSOLVE : 241
  • CONDEMN : 15
I fantasize about leaving advertising to go work with the guys on "Duck Dynasty."
  • ABSOLVE : 240
  • CONDEMN : 22
I was too lazy to pass around my supervisor's birthday card, so I just forged everyone's birthday wishes and called it a day.
  • ABSOLVE : 239
  • CONDEMN : 32
I keep thinking about how I'd monetize this site.
  • ABSOLVE : 239
  • CONDEMN : 102
I gave up on journalism because advertising pays more and creatives are better in bed.
  • ABSOLVE : 239
  • CONDEMN : 27
I'm the girl who get the job for doing a blow job. Who cares? It was 2 in 1!
  • ABSOLVE : 239
  • CONDEMN : 965
One of our "capabilities" is "multi-cultural" ad services because we have a black dude and enjoy mexican food.
  • ABSOLVE : 238
  • CONDEMN : 60
Women at work always talk about dieting and exercise around me, but I don't notice them talking like that around anyone else. I know I'm the overweight girl in an office of hotties, but FUCK YOU!
  • ABSOLVE : 238
  • CONDEMN : 18
I refer to my ECD as an "Extra" Creative Director.
  • ABSOLVE : 237
  • CONDEMN : 9
I gave our uptight, overly-Christian intern the awesome nickname "Pussy Destroyer".
  • ABSOLVE : 237
  • CONDEMN : 45
I'm sick of getting four hours to do a logo design.
  • ABSOLVE : 236
  • CONDEMN : 7
I put a thin rainbow sticker on the bumper of my CEO's brand new car because "the agency couldn't afford to give raises."
  • ABSOLVE : 236
  • CONDEMN : 9
"I like to get in around 1 so I mix in with those returning from lunch.
  • ABSOLVE : 236
  • CONDEMN : 42
After working as a creative in agencies for years, I went to the dark side and work for the client. I get paid decently, no longer have chest pains, and never think about work after leaving the office for the day (which happens at 5 or 6 pm instead of 2am). I have no regrets.
  • ABSOLVE : 235
  • CONDEMN : 6
I'm creative and I secretly like strategy.
  • ABSOLVE : 235
  • CONDEMN : 14
Sometimes, when I'm in a rush, I don't safely remove my hard drive.
  • ABSOLVE : 234
  • CONDEMN : 14
I'm an overpaid fan-boy desperately clinging to the notion that what I do is somehow culturally significant because once upon a time other creative guys in other agencies decades ago once wrote something that managed to scratch the surface of meaning. But really I'm a thief. A lazy wannabe with nothing to offer the world. Shit, I have trouble making a contribution in a pub conversation past weak pop culture references and imitations of other actually creative entities. Oh - and I wear shit tee-shirts.
  • ABSOLVE : 234
  • CONDEMN : 298
I think women who want to work full-time AND have babies are selfish brats who need to be stopped. If you want everyone to support your stance that 'Being a mother is a full-time job.' than go be a full-time Mom and let the professionals get some work done. The office isn't a fucking daycare and your baby looks like a retarded mongoloid.
  • ABSOLVE : 234
  • CONDEMN : 414
I once freelanced a poster for a band using nothing but stock photoshop filters and "outer glow." The client loved it.
  • ABSOLVE : 232
  • CONDEMN : 34
I had this ECD who smoked a lot of pot. Usually at lunch time. When he told me to change something in my layouts I'd do absolutely nothing and wait until after lunch to show it to him again. He would always say: "Much better now" and approve. FTW.
  • ABSOLVE : 232
  • CONDEMN : 6
I refuse to respond to emails from client's who have a @aol.com address.
  • ABSOLVE : 232
  • CONDEMN : 37
I slept with the account manager so she would expense my lunches
  • ABSOLVE : 232
  • CONDEMN : 178
When someone asks me to do something I have no idea how to do, I will invariably say "Yes." and then learn how to do it.
  • ABSOLVE : 232
  • CONDEMN : 13
The copywriters are useless
  • ABSOLVE : 232
  • CONDEMN : 672
I take power naps in the handicap bathroom.
  • ABSOLVE : 231
  • CONDEMN : 39
I tried to convince a chiropractic college to use the line "get a hand job right after school."
  • ABSOLVE : 229
  • CONDEMN : 32
Moleskin notebooks are still JUST notebooks.
  • ABSOLVE : 229
  • CONDEMN : 17
I got my latest job because I was mistaken for someone else.
  • ABSOLVE : 229
  • CONDEMN : 9
I had a SVP of Sales insist our firm's Creative Director and I take a meeting with his wholly eye-candy assistant because she "had some ideas" about our then current website initiatives. We humored him, and we took the meeting. For about five minutes, this barely articulate living Barbie doll dropped moronic idea after idiotic suggestion, the BEST of which were inextricably rooted in the '90s. So, I asked her what qualified her to comment on the websites we'd designed and developed, to which she replied that she "took a class, once." My head exploded, and I went off on her in a several minute rant before storming out.
  • ABSOLVE : 228
  • CONDEMN : 35
I trespassed in an abandoned amusement park while on the clock. My "workday" ended up being over 12 hours long.
  • ABSOLVE : 227
  • CONDEMN : 19
I hate when my FB friends post pictures of their babies or eat/pray/love trips on Facebook because it reminds me of the life I could be living had had i not gone into advertising.
  • ABSOLVE : 227
  • CONDEMN : 31
Handwriting fonts are fine.
  • ABSOLVE : 227
  • CONDEMN : 448
I remove everyone who blabs about "agency life" or "working long hours" from my fb newsfeed.
  • ABSOLVE : 226
  • CONDEMN : 10
I frequently "forget" to attach files to buy myself an extra 15 minutes.
  • ABSOLVE : 226
  • CONDEMN : 15
I hate the term "nazi" used in reference to anything other than killing jews.
  • ABSOLVE : 226
  • CONDEMN : 24
I intentionally avoid learning web based design because I'd rather make less money enjoying dead print mediums for the rest of my life
  • ABSOLVE : 226
  • CONDEMN : 27
This industry is a white man's fraternity. That said, you're all gonna work for me one day. Because I'm smart, hot and have a vagina. And you're just a dick.
  • ABSOLVE : 226
  • CONDEMN : 195
convinced a client there are plenty of " ipad designers " who have 10 plus years experience
  • ABSOLVE : 226
  • CONDEMN : 39
I think 'designing in the browser' is like designing a chair by going to a workshop and nailing wood together until you have something you can sit in. The results are dull and it's advocates seem to be failed designers who use coding to hide their lack of imagination.
  • ABSOLVE : 225
  • CONDEMN : 133
Sometimes I touch an art director's screen on purpose when reviewing work just to piss him/her off.
  • ABSOLVE : 224
  • CONDEMN : 103
I'm not actually a designer. I came to the office looking for directions and have been here ever since.
  • ABSOLVE : 223
  • CONDEMN : 9
I love it when the CD and I talk fonts and she asks me to "stroke it" more...
  • ABSOLVE : 223
  • CONDEMN : 8
I hired a hitman to take out one of my clients. Not really, but I gave it serious thought...
  • ABSOLVE : 223
  • CONDEMN : 7
I am a leading Chief Creative Officer at "looking busy".
  • ABSOLVE : 222
  • CONDEMN : 56
I don't write anything until after lunch, except this.
  • ABSOLVE : 222
  • CONDEMN : 31
I think all art schools are like puppy mills that saturate the creative landscape with shit.
  • ABSOLVE : 222
  • CONDEMN : 42
As a minority person working in a creative industry, I love how I can manipulate the clients who are racially hyper-sensitive to my advantage.
  • ABSOLVE : 222
  • CONDEMN : 51
Since the client didn't hire us to do their website, I let them create the crapiest, non-working website every produced in human history. Then watched in glee as they tried to "demonstrate" it live in front of hundreds of people, failing at every click...
  • ABSOLVE : 222
  • CONDEMN : 7
After long nights out drinking, I sometimes go back to the agency just to pee in people's trashcans.
  • ABSOLVE : 221
  • CONDEMN : 171
I wonder why there is so much miscommunication in a field where we are paid to be experts in communication.
  • ABSOLVE : 220
  • CONDEMN : 2
I just fired a client.
  • ABSOLVE : 220
  • CONDEMN : 3
I helped numerous politicians from the Republican party get elected and re-elected. And was compensated very well for it.
  • ABSOLVE : 220
  • CONDEMN : 654
For fun, I convinced an AE to only use Bing.
  • ABSOLVE : 219
  • CONDEMN : 19
I skipped out on a client call to go shopping at the Gap.
  • ABSOLVE : 219
  • CONDEMN : 141
At work we have a wall of shame that displays the all time worst requests from the client.
  • ABSOLVE : 219
  • CONDEMN : 9
I broke up with my boyfriend because I made my career a priority. I am scared I might look back and regret this someday.
  • ABSOLVE : 219
  • CONDEMN : 107
I dream of putting acid in the watercooler to inject some creativity into our agency's creatives, because if I hear them suggest running a competition on Facebook as a big idea again I'm going to explode.
  • ABSOLVE : 218
  • CONDEMN : 8
Looking busy all day is tiring.
  • ABSOLVE : 218
  • CONDEMN : 3
I freelance, but after reading all the sex comments on this site I'm seriously considering joining an ad agency.
  • ABSOLVE : 217
  • CONDEMN : 14
I use the magic wand tool. A LOT.
  • ABSOLVE : 217
  • CONDEMN : 50
I was once told that the man in my ad didn't read as a landlord, and that I should probably fix it by putting a landlord hat on him. A landlord hat.
  • ABSOLVE : 217
  • CONDEMN : 3
To make myself sound smarter, I use the word "narrative" when the word "story" would suffice.
  • ABSOLVE : 216
  • CONDEMN : 96
I didn't do shit today.
  • ABSOLVE : 216
  • CONDEMN : 3
Dropped out of ad school to start own agency so I could skip being a junior.
  • ABSOLVE : 216
  • CONDEMN : 21
I give not one fuck about my current freelance gig.
  • ABSOLVE : 216
  • CONDEMN : 27
I still dont get the Cadburys Gorilla
  • ABSOLVE : 215
  • CONDEMN : 31
At an agency party, I punched a hefty male CD whom many people disliked, in the face. The day after, the ECD approached me to ask what happened. I told him I was too drunk to remember. I lied. I was a fresh grad then. And for once I felt lucky to be a female :p
  • ABSOLVE : 215
  • CONDEMN : 41
I smoke enough pot for a small army, and I work in a high paying, fast paced dangerous environment. It gives me a thrill to be completely baked and be at work.
  • ABSOLVE : 215
  • CONDEMN : 395
I won two clients from the agency that fired me. I won't rest until I've taken their entire list and they have to shut down.
  • ABSOLVE : 215
  • CONDEMN : 3
I called in sick so I could finish the book I was reading.
  • ABSOLVE : 214
  • CONDEMN : 8
I give my Mac a hard shutdown on Fridays when Creative Suite is taking too long to quit.
  • ABSOLVE : 214
  • CONDEMN : 18
For 3 years, I've taken weed breaks 2-5 times a work day, and have gotten away with it at many different shops. Whether I'm great at hiding it, or they just accept it because I'm a "creative" is currently lost on me.
  • ABSOLVE : 213
  • CONDEMN : 106
I've dated designers for their font collections.
  • ABSOLVE : 213
  • CONDEMN : 36
I hate that I missed out on the days when a mirror of coke was in everybody's top drawer.
  • ABSOLVE : 213
  • CONDEMN : 45
I'm babysitting my Art Director.
  • ABSOLVE : 212
  • CONDEMN : 15
I believe that after 10 years a concept can be redone, just like any bad remake movie out there.
  • ABSOLVE : 212
  • CONDEMN : 28
The reason I missed the 6am call on that last shoot day in Mexico was because I was fucking one of the actresses the night before.
  • ABSOLVE : 211
  • CONDEMN : 59
I hate Mad Men. It's like a soap opera with advertising people.
  • ABSOLVE : 211
  • CONDEMN : 62
I worked 4 years for a talentless "art director". I did most of the creative work for his agency, and now he won't allow me to show that work in my portfolio. I secretly hope his business goes down.
  • ABSOLVE : 211
  • CONDEMN : 5
With both pregnancies, I never, ever made excuses or felt weird when turning off my office lights for a much needed nap, or closing the door to pump. I truly believe that if more women stood up for themselves by not making excuses and simply doing what they needed to do, the "good-ol boys club" that is advertising would respect that.
  • ABSOLVE : 209
  • CONDEMN : 36
I think copywriters who use double exclamation points should die a horrific death.
  • ABSOLVE : 208
  • CONDEMN : 6
Nobody uses QR codes.
  • ABSOLVE : 208
  • CONDEMN : 6
Contrary to my client's believe... I don't actually have any "magic" to work.
  • ABSOLVE : 207
  • CONDEMN : 20
I want out of this vacuous whore of an industry. It needs to die.
  • ABSOLVE : 207
  • CONDEMN : 38
When people ask me what I do I say "I am a designer." What I really do all day is make grammatical edits to brochures.
  • ABSOLVE : 207
  • CONDEMN : 30
CD told me "I had no idea how to speak to a female target." A week later at the holiday party, his date asked for my number. I've been seeing her ever since.
  • ABSOLVE : 207
  • CONDEMN : 21
I always leave the recipient blank until the very end whenever I email someone because I'm terrified of accidentally hitting "send" when I'm not ready.
  • ABSOLVE : 207
  • CONDEMN : 3
I have great difficulty responding to emails in all caps.
  • ABSOLVE : 206
  • CONDEMN : 4
I generally come in at least fifteen minutes late. I use the side door so the boss can't see me, and after that I just sorta space out for about an hour. I just stare at my desk; but it looks like I'm working. I do that for probably another hour after lunch, too. I'd say in a given week I probably only do about fifteen minutes of real, actual, work.
  • ABSOLVE : 206
  • CONDEMN : 59
Sometimes i just want to kill it and bill it.
  • ABSOLVE : 206
  • CONDEMN : 1
I just want to enjoy design again.
  • ABSOLVE : 206
  • CONDEMN : 3
Leaving the agency world to open up on my own was the best, hardest decision I ever made. Even doing small brochures for Mom & Pop businesses, I don't miss all the pricks, freaks and untalented posers who think you're not anyone unless you're shooting in Prague. Sayonara, idiots. I'll be getting off work at 4pm today if I choose.
  • ABSOLVE : 206
  • CONDEMN : 4
I like to read AgencySpy to see all the terrible things people have to say about my bosses.
  • ABSOLVE : 205
  • CONDEMN : 13
I once hit reply on a client's email instead of forward as I had intended, and in the message I *thought* was going to my co-worker, I said "this woman is IMPOSSIBLE!" The very millisecond I hit send I realized what was happening.
  • ABSOLVE : 205
  • CONDEMN : 11
I accidentally sexted a Client.
  • ABSOLVE : 205
  • CONDEMN : 27
I wear headphones all day long whether I am listening to music or not simply to disuade people from asking me anything about anything.
  • ABSOLVE : 205
  • CONDEMN : 2
A lot of my artist coworkers confide in me because they think I'm a nice person but I secretly think they are all idiots who need to grow thicker skin.
  • ABSOLVE : 204
  • CONDEMN : 13
I work with idiots but pretend they are smart
  • ABSOLVE : 203
  • CONDEMN : 7
I sudgested a dubstep track for a corporate video of a very boring company because they wanted to be "down with the kids". They used it.
  • ABSOLVE : 203
  • CONDEMN : 31
I showed up late, and the boss met me at the back door. When he told me I was late, I said I'd make it up to him by leaving early -- and he bought it...
  • ABSOLVE : 203
  • CONDEMN : 9
When I'm on conference calls with stupid clients, my coworkers and I put them on mute and act out Star Wars light saber battle scenes with sticks.
  • ABSOLVE : 203
  • CONDEMN : 17
Whenever I hear the word "consultant," I know it's time to get the portfolio in order.
  • ABSOLVE : 202
  • CONDEMN : 4
At this point in my career, I want to do as little work for as much money as possible.
  • ABSOLVE : 202
  • CONDEMN : 20
Whenever someone hands me a Klout business card, I say, "Wow! That's a great card!" before throwing it in the trash...
  • ABSOLVE : 202
  • CONDEMN : 12
I have stopped working up to my potential, and started working down to my pay grade.
  • ABSOLVE : 201
  • CONDEMN : 4
I once had to make moodboard of a huge crowd. I put a tiny speeching hitler in the middle. Very small, but I knew he was there.
  • ABSOLVE : 201
  • CONDEMN : 14
I often convince clients that Retweets are more valuable than sales.
  • ABSOLVE : 201
  • CONDEMN : 98
After working at a new job for six weeks, the recruiting firm that placed me sent over 50 specialty bakery cupcakes to thank my boss for the business. I ate one during my exit interview when I quit twenty minutes after they arrived.
  • ABSOLVE : 201
  • CONDEMN : 5
I wish I could start interviews with..."I plan to take your job"
  • ABSOLVE : 200
  • CONDEMN : 6
I barely get anything from a conf-call with French guys speaking English.
  • ABSOLVE : 200
  • CONDEMN : 18
A design went back for redesign five times for not being feminine enough. I put a vagina on it.
  • ABSOLVE : 200
  • CONDEMN : 6
Being an 'expert' in social media is like being an expert at taking bread out of the fridge.
  • ABSOLVE : 200
  • CONDEMN : 6
I miss Quark...
  • ABSOLVE : 200
  • CONDEMN : 453
If you're a student and say you're freelance, I automatically assume you're unemployed.
  • ABSOLVE : 200
  • CONDEMN : 17
I hate being told how something should look, by Advertising Art Directors that can't do it themselves.
  • ABSOLVE : 199
  • CONDEMN : 16
When I edit wedding videos, I secretly reverse the "cake shot" for a quick laugh because it looks like they reach into each other's mouth and pull out a whole piece of cake.
  • ABSOLVE : 199
  • CONDEMN : 4
I emailed a photo of myself holding my Lion to all the Creative Directors who've let me go with the subject line "Suck it".
  • ABSOLVE : 198
  • CONDEMN : 20
I am pursuing a client who owns an Indian Restaurant just so I can watch Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom for research.
  • ABSOLVE : 198
  • CONDEMN : 84
All throughout my two years as a copywriter, I have been trying to inject hobos in every concept, script, TVC, radio ad, activation idea I've been tasked to come up. I have not stopped trying.
  • ABSOLVE : 198
  • CONDEMN : 26
I am not a people person.
  • ABSOLVE : 198
  • CONDEMN : 9
i'll totally use the shit out of lens flare and I don't give a fuck cause people think it looks "MAGICAL."
  • ABSOLVE : 198
  • CONDEMN : 219
After you ask me to review your portfolio, I immediately go and update mine so it's stands out more than yours.
  • ABSOLVE : 197
  • CONDEMN : 50
Most people take this business way too seriously. Really, we aren't that important.
  • ABSOLVE : 197
  • CONDEMN : 11
Although I don't use them myself, I secretly think people who have a fit when they see Comic Sans or Papyrus need to re-assess their priorities in life.
  • ABSOLVE : 197
  • CONDEMN : 34
Despite the clients, despite the bugets, business people, buzzwords and hours, I love being professionally creative.
  • ABSOLVE : 197
  • CONDEMN : 36
Openly think that people confessing on this website that smoking weed made their work more creative or that an employee giving them a blow job while on the clock is somehow improving their life are disgrace to the industry. I get blown and high off the clock.
  • ABSOLVE : 196
  • CONDEMN : 43
I don't want to wish getting hit by a bus on to anyone, but I do hope that everyone who is not a designer / developer that sets the amount of time required for a project stubs their toe. Very hard.
  • ABSOLVE : 196
  • CONDEMN : 10
I'm going to stop using Lorem Ipsum in proofs and instead type "You haven't sent me this copy" repeatedly.
  • ABSOLVE : 196
  • CONDEMN : 3
I can't handle it when my closeted gay boss tells me my layouts need "more beef."
  • ABSOLVE : 196
  • CONDEMN : 15
I do free creative stuff for hot girls
  • ABSOLVE : 196
  • CONDEMN : 79
Stop telling clients "We have a great design team". I'M THE ONLY DESIGNER HERE! Give me some fucking credit.
  • ABSOLVE : 196
  • CONDEMN : 3
My partner can't concept. And it's fucking annoying.
  • ABSOLVE : 196
  • CONDEMN : 30
I hate designers who put "I do it all" in their skill set. NO YOU DON'T you pompous asshole, if you did you wouldn't still be a fucking designer.
  • ABSOLVE : 195
  • CONDEMN : 9
I don't pay attention during client meetings. I just wait for the AEs to send a recap.
  • ABSOLVE : 195
  • CONDEMN : 65
Just because my desk is next to the printer does not mean I know how to fix it.
  • ABSOLVE : 195
  • CONDEMN : 1
I was secretly happy when my agency lost that account after nearly 100 years.
  • ABSOLVE : 195
  • CONDEMN : 12
I'd rather poop at the agency than home so I can get paid for it.
  • ABSOLVE : 194
  • CONDEMN : 4
My boss was having a bad day and yelled at me at the top of his lungs in front of the entire open office for no fault of mine. Within a week I quit my job calling him an asshole to his face on the way out. Since then I've only freelanced 6 months in the last year and traveled through 13 countries in 2 months. I don't have job security and I don't know when my next paying gig is coming but I've never been happier. I've been in the business 15 years.
  • ABSOLVE : 194
  • CONDEMN : 1
I couldn't make it in New York, so I moved somewhere else and became a happy person.
  • ABSOLVE : 194
  • CONDEMN : 4
I post things on here so I can click absolve and make myself feel better.
  • ABSOLVE : 193
  • CONDEMN : 27
When friends ask me to draw a tattoo for them, I want to stove their head in with a brick. It never fails... I'll be at a party and some asshole will pull me aside and say, "hey I got this sweet idea for the next tattoo I want to get, think you could help me?" I don't know, think you could blow me? Pay a fucking tattoo artist for your fucking tattoo!
  • ABSOLVE : 193
  • CONDEMN : 19
I sell my friends facebook images on stockphoto sites to make a little money for pot.
  • ABSOLVE : 193
  • CONDEMN : 450
The more I work with websites, the more I hate them and the entire industry. Why does everything have to be animated and Flash and interactive? Load quickly and show me what I need. And social media can go sit and spin.
  • ABSOLVE : 192
  • CONDEMN : 14
After the client sent me to Nashville and paid thousands of dollars for their new jingle, when they sat down in our conference room to hear it, instead I played Led Zepplin's "Immigrant Song" at full volume. They called me an, "Asshole"...
  • ABSOLVE : 192
  • CONDEMN : 53
At a trade show I saw multiple signs that said "See something suspicious, call our security service line..." I called in and described a few members in competing agency.
  • ABSOLVE : 192
  • CONDEMN : 73
I think "Flash" isn't dead.
  • ABSOLVE : 192
  • CONDEMN : 508
Helvetica makes me horny.
  • ABSOLVE : 192
  • CONDEMN : 98
i told a girl that she'd be in a commercial if she showed me her tits.
  • ABSOLVE : 192
  • CONDEMN : 492
I annoy one of the project managers on purpose just to see her nipples get hard.
  • ABSOLVE : 191
  • CONDEMN : 95
I keep a blue twitter logo that I put into lots of decks, so that CDs and clients will think I've thought about a social media component. In ten or twelve presentations I've never pointed it out or explained what it's doing there, and no one's ever asked about it.
  • ABSOLVE : 191
  • CONDEMN : 9
Sometimes I like to remind the account team what they really are: Fleshlights for our clients.
  • ABSOLVE : 190
  • CONDEMN : 28
I sat reading this website for about 30 minutes, while my boss is telling an in-house client that there's no way I can take this project for another 2 days because I'm too busy.
  • ABSOLVE : 190
  • CONDEMN : 4
The next time a Creative presents a Facebook app as a "big idea" and our ECD says "Ohmahgod, that's brilliant" I'm going to burn down my office.
  • ABSOLVE : 190
  • CONDEMN : 9
I keep a folder of pre-corrupted files on my desktop so if I need to buy some time on a job I just do a quick 'save as' and email them to the client for proofing or approval
  • ABSOLVE : 190
  • CONDEMN : 9
Some days, the phrase "I wanted to keep it simple" is interchangeable with the phrase "I went to bed really late last night".
  • ABSOLVE : 190
  • CONDEMN : 1
Account people are THE WORST.
  • ABSOLVE : 190
  • CONDEMN : 31
I should not be looking at this website and working.
  • ABSOLVE : 189
  • CONDEMN : 6
I've never had sex in my office, but I want to something fierce.
  • ABSOLVE : 189
  • CONDEMN : 15
I switched out all the design books I expensed with shitty stock photo annuals and brought them home for my personal library. FUCK YOU I EARNED THEM!
  • ABSOLVE : 189
  • CONDEMN : 86
I've convinced myself recycling ideas helps the planet.
  • ABSOLVE : 189
  • CONDEMN : 46
I made dinner reservations under the name "Bogusky" at several restaurants near CPB's office. Then I didn't show up. Twice.
  • ABSOLVE : 189
  • CONDEMN : 15
My most hated acronym: ASAP!!!
  • ABSOLVE : 189
  • CONDEMN : 11
I lay awake most nights wondering why Instagram exists.
  • ABSOLVE : 189
  • CONDEMN : 39
My commute is 15 minutes. On my lunch hour, I have exactly enough time to go home, fuck my girlfriend, and take a few bong rips before going back to the office. I do much better work on those afternoons.
  • ABSOLVE : 189
  • CONDEMN : 19
I stopped bullshitting peers on why I work on some things and ignore other things. One night out drinking I heard myself explaining to a colleague that "the truth is, I'm focussing on what my gut tells me is important". I've since stolen that from my drunken self, cleaned it up, and successfully use it during office hours. I went from flaky to strategically focussed without changing a thing. It bothers me that this post is more than one sentence long.
  • ABSOLVE : 188
  • CONDEMN : 12
I can't wait for the day when clients realize social media strategists are completely worthless.
  • ABSOLVE : 188
  • CONDEMN : 24
There are too many fags in this business. Yes, I said fags. And I wish I could give feedback that their creative was "too faggy."
  • ABSOLVE : 188
  • CONDEMN : 625
I hate all the people who love this industry.
  • ABSOLVE : 187
  • CONDEMN : 58
I'm sick of people telling me how long they think something should take to be designed. Fuck Off...and do it yourself then....bitch.
  • ABSOLVE : 187
  • CONDEMN : 10
My old design partner and I meet up on weekends at the agency to have sex all over the building--including his desk, conference rooms, the kitchen, and the stairways. I don't even work there anymore.
  • ABSOLVE : 187
  • CONDEMN : 21
account interns look better than creative interns
  • ABSOLVE : 187
  • CONDEMN : 91
The only career advice I give is to stay the hell out of art school. Go become a baker. No one ever tells a baker to move a chocolate chip a hair to the left.
  • ABSOLVE : 187
  • CONDEMN : 1
I've been designing for years but want to go off and be my own boss, do something more creative and inspiring, where I make all the decisions and get to meet really interesting people, that's why I'm going off to be a truck driver.
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 1
My job consists of 25% Photoshop and 75% Googling Photoshop tutorials.
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 10
I get my best tag lines off of my friend's GChat statuses
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 14
I want to tell my coworkers to get back to work but then I remember that I'm hardly working as well.
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 18
I leave my earphones in all day at work, even with no music playing, to keep the crazies from trying to talk to me.
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 3
I'm a senior in the middle of my capstone course. I'm now terrified to graduate in May.
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 35
I'm 32 years old and I still wear Vans with my suits to the office.
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 41
I took a screen shot of my 90% absolved confession and printed it out. Now, when my co-workers give me shit about my transgression, I wave the printed confession in front of their faces and say, "Yea? Well a jury of my peers forgave me, so suck it!"
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 10
The Black Keys suck.
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 162
I write lewd/sexual/predatory comments on all of the clients' facebook posts from the agency that fired me last year.
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 93
Today's task is to spread 20 mins of work over 8 hours
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 14
I FUCKING HATE ADVERTISING.
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 20
I hate Mad Men. Hate it.
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 70
I have a DVD stuck to the wall in front of me. I use it as a rear view mirror, so I can see my boss coming.
  • ABSOLVE : 186
  • CONDEMN : 2
CLIENT: Can we relate our product back to football/the Super Bowl somehow and develop a full campaign in two weeks? ACCOUNT TEAM: Absolutely!!!!! xoxox ~*~ :) <3 ~*~ STRATEGY/PLANNING TEAM: Oh what the fuck. Does the product resemble an egg in any way? Well... there you go. CREATIVE: This product looks nothing like a fucking egg. PRODUCTION: What the fucking fuck are these people smoking, and why aren't we getting any of it? CONSUMER: What was that commercial about again?
  • ABSOLVE : 185
  • CONDEMN : 17
I told my boss that dpi stands for Detroit Pixel Initiative and that it's a hidden billing code that most output houses use to con agencies...
  • ABSOLVE : 185
  • CONDEMN : 19
I apply more craft and creative thinking to my Out of Office Autoreply than I do to my client work.
  • ABSOLVE : 185
  • CONDEMN : 17
A client asked me to "Photoshop me to appear younger, thinner, more attractive." So, I replaced her pic with someone else.
  • ABSOLVE : 185
  • CONDEMN : 7
"No changes." feels like someone saying "I love you." to me.
  • ABSOLVE : 185
  • CONDEMN : 0
I bullshitted my way into a Creative Director position.
  • ABSOLVE : 185
  • CONDEMN : 73
My current client thinks I have bowel problems because I take 6 or 7 10 minute long dumps during our editing sessions.
  • ABSOLVE : 184
  • CONDEMN : 45
Serif fonts make me happy.
  • ABSOLVE : 184
  • CONDEMN : 20
My typefaces are all stolen
  • ABSOLVE : 184
  • CONDEMN : 58
I check on Ebay how sellers describe the brand I am working on. I call it qualitative guerilla research.
  • ABSOLVE : 184
  • CONDEMN : 3
I utterly despise men who want to sleep with me looking for a favor, a break, a job, a recommendation or a claim of glory. Specially the shameless, married ones who go home with a dumbass wife.
  • ABSOLVE : 184
  • CONDEMN : 119
I hate MS excel. and powerpoint.
  • ABSOLVE : 184
  • CONDEMN : 6
I have not brushed my hair or shaven in 3 weeks.
  • ABSOLVE : 184
  • CONDEMN : 83
If I see another adopted "keep calm" poster, I'm going to get very angry.
  • ABSOLVE : 184
  • CONDEMN : 10
I am too fucking honest. And not arrogant enough for this business.
  • ABSOLVE : 184
  • CONDEMN : 29
I just finished a Flash website
  • ABSOLVE : 184
  • CONDEMN : 1306
Here's a twist. I can't stand working with men.
  • ABSOLVE : 183
  • CONDEMN : 83
No, I don't "know what you mean."
  • ABSOLVE : 183
  • CONDEMN : 2
Can we all agree to please stop using these words: leverage, assets, integrate, innovation, bandwidth, asap, equity. If we're all supposedly creative, then let's get creative and use different words.
  • ABSOLVE : 183
  • CONDEMN : 6
My lunch break consists of getting on any subway and taking a nap
  • ABSOLVE : 182
  • CONDEMN : 2
"Creative" is a misnomer about 90% of the time.
  • ABSOLVE : 182
  • CONDEMN : 3
The more exclamation points that my co-worker uses--in copy and in email--the more I want to strangle him. No one is that happy. No one.
  • ABSOLVE : 181
  • CONDEMN : 12
I bugged my boss' office. He thinks I'm a genius. I bring him "just what he was thinking".
  • ABSOLVE : 181
  • CONDEMN : 33
When I'm bored in a meeting I look at each person and wonder what they look like having sex. Then when I get bored with that I picture what they would look like having sex with the person sitting next to them.
  • ABSOLVE : 181
  • CONDEMN : 12
I Google random crap throughout the day... for no apparent reason.
  • ABSOLVE : 181
  • CONDEMN : 7
I once had a Junior chick do me a blow job to grant her a job in my agency.
  • ABSOLVE : 181
  • CONDEMN : 2205
When an A.E. tells me to dumb down the copy, I toss in words like "um" and "duh."
  • ABSOLVE : 180
  • CONDEMN : 6
I have ZERO interest in my coworkers birthdays/anniversaries. If I get one more email about some coworker's shitty birthday that is forwarded to everyone in the company with everyone else only adding to the already incredibly annoying email chain; I WILL LOSE MY FUCKING MIND
  • ABSOLVE : 180
  • CONDEMN : 22
I ignored a request to Photoshop white people to make them "blacker".
  • ABSOLVE : 180
  • CONDEMN : 2
I honestly believed that working in a advertising agency could change the world for the better.
  • ABSOLVE : 180
  • CONDEMN : 399
Our President thinks "money shot" is a term for an important shot in a spot. We try to get him to say it as often as possible in meetings. He's foreign.
  • ABSOLVE : 180
  • CONDEMN : 19
I got into this business because I likeed to draw and make logos for friend's bands back in high-school. Well $60,000 in student loan debt from a 'world's top-10 design college' and 5 years working professionally later I hate drawing and I hate brands and I hate logos.
  • ABSOLVE : 180
  • CONDEMN : 5
I didn't tell the new CD today his fly was open because I didn't want that awkward moment. (For some reason I always notice the open flys.)
  • ABSOLVE : 179
  • CONDEMN : 8
I use photo booth as a mirror.
  • ABSOLVE : 179
  • CONDEMN : 6
One day I discovered FedEx "Next Day Morning Delivery Rush Guarantee." Since then I have anonymously sent about nine AOL Installation CDs from the 90s to my friend in IT.
  • ABSOLVE : 179
  • CONDEMN : 7
I told my coworkers to find my confession even though I haven't confessed..... yet :)
  • ABSOLVE : 178
  • CONDEMN : 34
Your passive-aggressive emails that end in smiley faces make me fantasize about smashing your goofy face with that laptop you're always clacking on.
  • ABSOLVE : 178
  • CONDEMN : 6
I'm a Creative Director who walks into work every day thinking "God, I hate pretending to be an adult."
  • ABSOLVE : 178
  • CONDEMN : 10
I flew to New York to oversee a voiceover session that could have been handled from my car on the way to work.
  • ABSOLVE : 178
  • CONDEMN : 15
I spent all morning photoshopping my friends faces into awkward Snuggie pics.
  • ABSOLVE : 178
  • CONDEMN : 2
My opinion of someone goes down when they don't pronounce Helvetica Neue correctly.
  • ABSOLVE : 178
  • CONDEMN : 373
I taught at Miami Ad School for two years and told every one of my students to forget about advertising and do something with their creative abilities that actually matters.
  • ABSOLVE : 178
  • CONDEMN : 19
I think everyone has a sense of humour. But only the creatives have a good one.
  • ABSOLVE : 178
  • CONDEMN : 66
I steal all my design from Star Trek : The Next Generation.
  • ABSOLVE : 177
  • CONDEMN : 38
I convinced a junior account person the more files you put on your laptop, the heavier it gets.
  • ABSOLVE : 177
  • CONDEMN : 1
I work at an agency that is often praised for its creative culture and playful work environment, yet you'll rarely see anyone playing with any of the agency props, toys, or games if there aren't current/prospective clients on campus.
  • ABSOLVE : 177
  • CONDEMN : 7
I said I needed a second monitor so I could watch movies all day.
  • ABSOLVE : 176
  • CONDEMN : 22
When a client art directs me to the point where the work no longer has any semblance to my original idea, I don't get upset, I get paid.
  • ABSOLVE : 176
  • CONDEMN : 17
May the bridges I burn light the way.
  • ABSOLVE : 176
  • CONDEMN : 7
Reading this site strengthened my resolve to quit my job to pursue my dreams.
  • ABSOLVE : 175
  • CONDEMN : 2
I sneaked pictures of Bill Cosby and Hulk Hogan into the last video I made for a travel company. As long as they don't go through it frame by frame then I'll be fine
  • ABSOLVE : 175
  • CONDEMN : 6
I call IT when the coffee machine breaks
  • ABSOLVE : 175
  • CONDEMN : 85
I could've helped make a dent in world hunger, child hunger, deforestation, and homelessness if my agency weren't so single-mindedly obsessed with winning awards.
  • ABSOLVE : 174
  • CONDEMN : 36
I don't save as .jpg... I screenshot my work for approval.
  • ABSOLVE : 174
  • CONDEMN : 53
I judge co-workers that shit at work.
  • ABSOLVE : 174
  • CONDEMN : 449
When my highest paid CG artist took her 3rd "surprise pregnancy" extended maternity leave in 4 years, I stopped hiring any woman under the age of 35.
  • ABSOLVE : 174
  • CONDEMN : 369
I understand your brand has 15 colors, but if I use all 15 on one small poster it looks like four circus clowns ejaculated all over it in Myriad Pro.
  • ABSOLVE : 174
  • CONDEMN : 0
I buy the Economist, but find reading it to be utterly intolerable.
  • ABSOLVE : 173
  • CONDEMN : 30
I've crop dusted hovering art directors.
  • ABSOLVE : 173
  • CONDEMN : 8
I never seriously proofread the 'Terms & Conditions' in the brochure.
  • ABSOLVE : 173
  • CONDEMN : 19
I'm a strategist but take pleasure when the CD picks my copy over the writer's.
  • ABSOLVE : 173
  • CONDEMN : 34
When I first heard the term "AA" used to describe people in a layout, I immediately thought of "Anti Aircraft" and then immediately "Alcoholics Anonymous" before I realized it was "African Americans"
  • ABSOLVE : 173
  • CONDEMN : 6
On any given day, I write more Facebook statuses than headlines.
  • ABSOLVE : 173
  • CONDEMN : 67
I just used "Let me Google that for you" in a conversation with an AE.
  • ABSOLVE : 173
  • CONDEMN : 7
I listen cheerfully and earnestly to you drone on and on with your micro management details and then ask you to email it so I don't forget. Really I'm just covering my ass and to prove that they are your dumb ass directions
  • ABSOLVE : 172
  • CONDEMN : 0
I take a shit every morning in the handicap bathroom. :(
  • ABSOLVE : 172
  • CONDEMN : 20
I hate people who have too many applications on their dock.
  • ABSOLVE : 172
  • CONDEMN : 42
I hate facebook.
  • ABSOLVE : 172
  • CONDEMN : 9
Interns have the best asses...I mean ideas. I mean asses.
  • ABSOLVE : 172
  • CONDEMN : 47
My billable time is spent working on my book and looking for a new job.
  • ABSOLVE : 172
  • CONDEMN : 37
All my writer friends think that I'm the dark side of the intellectual world, because I work in advertising.
  • ABSOLVE : 172
  • CONDEMN : 20
Those who can, do. Those who can't... become clients and criticize you for doing.
  • ABSOLVE : 172
  • CONDEMN : 9
I'm not a quiet person, I'm just waiting for you to make sense.
  • ABSOLVE : 172
  • CONDEMN : 13
I would never hire a fat person.
  • ABSOLVE : 172
  • CONDEMN : 616
I live vicariously through these confessions.
  • ABSOLVE : 171
  • CONDEMN : 6
When interviewing problem clients or clients with no real vision, I will doze for a few minutes and let them talk about what they want and then say "Ok that sounds cool. Now I want you to close your eyes, picture it and tell me what that looks like.." I call it a User Intuition Exercise. They feel like I am doing some special research before I present them with the creative I would have shown anyway and which they now LOVE.
  • ABSOLVE : 171
  • CONDEMN : 7
My boss always tries to work midgets into our work. I think he may be the greatest creative mind of his generation.
  • ABSOLVE : 171
  • CONDEMN : 49
I want everyone complaining about the ad industry on here to get fired so us newbies can get a chance
  • ABSOLVE : 169
  • CONDEMN : 40
Just because my boss was arrested for lewd and lascivious behavior, does not mean we should listen to Christian music as penance.
  • ABSOLVE : 169
  • CONDEMN : 2
A creative director who doesn't know digital isn't a creative director.
  • ABSOLVE : 169
  • CONDEMN : 20
My filing cabinet is really my liqour cabinet.
  • ABSOLVE : 169
  • CONDEMN : 8
If I hear "it is what it is" one more time.....
  • ABSOLVE : 169
  • CONDEMN : 16
I take smoking breaks although I don't smoke.
  • ABSOLVE : 169
  • CONDEMN : 8
I do all my best work between 2-5am.
  • ABSOLVE : 169
  • CONDEMN : 8
Don't critique my copy if you can't write a coherent email.
  • ABSOLVE : 169
  • CONDEMN : 3
While they go hand in hand, advertising and marketing are NOT the same thing. I not only judge you for thinking that, but I think it makes you look stupid.
  • ABSOLVE : 168
  • CONDEMN : 11
I've made an app for the sake of having an app.
  • ABSOLVE : 168
  • CONDEMN : 63
My boss is a fucking idiot. Not only has he got shit design knowledge but his extent of assessing whether you're a good designer is by how many hot keys you know in Adobe programes.
  • ABSOLVE : 168
  • CONDEMN : 10
I convinced my client that AOL Chat is making a comeback.
  • ABSOLVE : 168
  • CONDEMN : 139
I will never win a Pencil or a Lion. I also never have to work past 5pm. I am totally okay with that trade-off.
  • ABSOLVE : 168
  • CONDEMN : 9
The copywriter just took my mouse to "show me how to center things" in Photoshop. Wayne Brady gonna choke a bitch.
  • ABSOLVE : 168
  • CONDEMN : 2
I came up with one of the best-known slogans in the world. And I was stoned when I wrote it.
  • ABSOLVE : 168
  • CONDEMN : 7
I haven't done anything at work but check Facebook and Buzzfeed for the last month and a half.
  • ABSOLVE : 167
  • CONDEMN : 63
If a post on here is too long, I condemn it without reading it. Get to the point.
  • ABSOLVE : 167
  • CONDEMN : 23
I cite the movie American Psycho as a creative inspiration so my co-workers will fear me and avoid interaction.
  • ABSOLVE : 167
  • CONDEMN : 4
I think the "iWhatever" naming bandwagon is the laziest and most meaningless branding convention possible. Everyone (including Apple) really need to cut it out and come up with something that hasn't been done to death over the past decade!
  • ABSOLVE : 167
  • CONDEMN : 6
If you're not giving me a raise, this is all the work you'll ever get from me. And I'm leaving on time.
  • ABSOLVE : 167
  • CONDEMN : 1
I fart with no regard with headphones on. My writer doesn't find it nearly as funny as I do.
  • ABSOLVE : 167
  • CONDEMN : 245
I photograph models for a major clothing company. I installed a two-way mirror in the models' dressing room and jack off while watching them change clothes.
  • ABSOLVE : 167
  • CONDEMN : 1680
I act like a diva when people intentionally double-book me for meetings.
  • ABSOLVE : 166
  • CONDEMN : 79
I can't watch a movie/TV show without counting the amount of product placements I see. I also can't help pointing this out to the non-advergeek friend I'm with that could care less. Sorry friends.
  • ABSOLVE : 166
  • CONDEMN : 11
Fuck it- it's Friday afternoon. I'm having a cigarette inside the office.
  • ABSOLVE : 166
  • CONDEMN : 103
Buried within every spot I've ever done is a vocal track of me yelling "One Show Gold! D&AD! Cannes!" You won't hear it, but it's there. I call it "subliminal keywording."
  • ABSOLVE : 166
  • CONDEMN : 19
I get away with making more sexually harassing comments than my male co-workers because I'm a lesbian and they think it's funny.
  • ABSOLVE : 166
  • CONDEMN : 76
My billboard helps sell cheeseburgers to fat people.
  • ABSOLVE : 166
  • CONDEMN : 70
I haven't won half the awards on my resume.
  • ABSOLVE : 166
  • CONDEMN : 760
My creative director is a fucking hack.
  • ABSOLVE : 166
  • CONDEMN : 5
Let's just be honest, women don't belong in the workplace.
  • ABSOLVE : 166
  • CONDEMN : 1355
I find "inspiration" by going to comedy shows.
  • ABSOLVE : 166
  • CONDEMN : 20
I judge the kerning on homeless people's signs.
  • ABSOLVE : 166
  • CONDEMN : 50
Every time I see or hear a McDonald's ad, and think of the money someone got paid to "create" it, I want to shit on someone's head.
  • ABSOLVE : 165
  • CONDEMN : 16
I use the word "Discover" despite the fact no one has ever discovered anything by clicking my web banners.
  • ABSOLVE : 165
  • CONDEMN : 16
I type "result" as "reslut" in my emails to clients deliberately then claim it's a typo.
  • ABSOLVE : 165
  • CONDEMN : 10
I have to quell urges to bitchslap my Art Director in the face anytime he pitches a half-baked idea for a spot and says "You know, just make the dialogue funny."
  • ABSOLVE : 165
  • CONDEMN : 6
I often tell my publisher that very easy, simple design changes he requests are "not technically possible", because his ideas are terrible, and he won't listen to reason.
  • ABSOLVE : 165
  • CONDEMN : 7
Two evil account people at my agency.... have phone numbers that start with 666. Coincidence? I think not.
  • ABSOLVE : 165
  • CONDEMN : 2
Our client redesigned their print ad in Microsoft Paint. It ran. I had the team autograph it and hung it on the wall.
  • ABSOLVE : 165
  • CONDEMN : 1
I made the logo bigger.
  • ABSOLVE : 165
  • CONDEMN : 206
I want to convert all of the text on my company's website to 10pt font so we don't get any more clients over 50.
  • ABSOLVE : 164
  • CONDEMN : 20
Print still excites me
  • ABSOLVE : 164
  • CONDEMN : 10
I hate being told what to do by women.
  • ABSOLVE : 164
  • CONDEMN : 708
I'd sleep with 99% of my male creative coworkers. Maybe it's all the creative energy bouncing around or maybe I'm just a whore. I haven't done it yet, but if given the opportunity, I totally would.
  • ABSOLVE : 164
  • CONDEMN : 51
A padded bra is false advertising.
  • ABSOLVE : 163
  • CONDEMN : 48
My boss likes to yell down the hallway for me when he needs little projects done. I ignore him until he comes all the way to my desk and pretend like I didn't hear him.
  • ABSOLVE : 163
  • CONDEMN : 1
Every time I have to justify at length why a design took 4, 6, or 8 hours instead of 1 to a non-design coworker I feel like quitting this field altogether.
  • ABSOLVE : 163
  • CONDEMN : 5
I can't stand ads that still use the old Twitter logo. Twitter dot com slash logo, people.
  • ABSOLVE : 163
  • CONDEMN : 62
I give a big "Fuck You" to anyone who says "Happy Monday!"
  • ABSOLVE : 163
  • CONDEMN : 22
As a 27 year old male actor, I am tired of dealing with vapid c, anorexic co-stars and would rather bang the cute PA who actually looks like women with her curves
  • ABSOLVE : 163
  • CONDEMN : 22
I am deathly afraid that once I get a job with a real creative firm, I won't be good enough because I've spent to long at a place where I design what they tell me to, not what I actually come up with.
  • ABSOLVE : 163
  • CONDEMN : 5
I would rather have my cervix lasered than brainstorm with my art director.
  • ABSOLVE : 162
  • CONDEMN : 22
sometimes when i get bored and annoyed at retouching, ill just drag out the clock on a project by putting elaborate corpse paint on everyone like a black metal album cover.
  • ABSOLVE : 162
  • CONDEMN : 19
I insist on the voice talent pronouncing it properly as ass-phalt, not ash-phalt.
  • ABSOLVE : 162
  • CONDEMN : 4
The only time I ever physically go to visit someone else's desk in this office is when I know that they have candy available.
  • ABSOLVE : 162
  • CONDEMN : 14
when my art director partner wants to create something cool without really showing/selling the brand/product, i just want to punch him back to art school.
  • ABSOLVE : 162
  • CONDEMN : 19
I got drunk to write headlines for a rehab center.
  • ABSOLVE : 161
  • CONDEMN : 5
I look like i know what im doing. I actually have no fucking idea.
  • ABSOLVE : 161
  • CONDEMN : 12
I silently hi-fived myself when I saw my confessional made it on the site.
  • ABSOLVE : 161
  • CONDEMN : 14
Just because I wrote an idea in an email that's sent to your inbox doesn't make it "our" idea.
  • ABSOLVE : 161
  • CONDEMN : 5
A status meeting would be a great time to die.
  • ABSOLVE : 161
  • CONDEMN : 5
I'm in advertising. I have an ad blocker in my browser and mute all commercials.
  • ABSOLVE : 161
  • CONDEMN : 2
I work harder for hot accounts girls.
  • ABSOLVE : 160
  • CONDEMN : 57
I've made a bad habit of falling in love with any cute, mean, dark haired male copywriter that I meet. What can I say - I like a man who has his way with words. And then with me.
  • ABSOLVE : 160
  • CONDEMN : 36
Too many to count. I design crap for money. I am a bad person
  • ABSOLVE : 160
  • CONDEMN : 13
I hate Miami Ad School interns. They always come up with "ideas" where they ask people to upload videos or pictures on social media to later do something with those like a youtube video.
  • ABSOLVE : 160
  • CONDEMN : 10
Unattractive women coworkers are the worst.
  • ABSOLVE : 160
  • CONDEMN : 462
I don't care how important you are. If you're an asshole, I'm putting you last on the email chain.
  • ABSOLVE : 160
  • CONDEMN : 2
Went to an agency party...was super hungover the next day at work. Barfed in the backroom. Blamed the office dog.
  • ABSOLVE : 159
  • CONDEMN : 68
I confess, I'm a dash nazi. I'm frustrated that people don't know there are three different dashes and that they are NOT interchangeable.
  • ABSOLVE : 159
  • CONDEMN : 34
I use catchphrases from TV shows as CTAs.
  • ABSOLVE : 159
  • CONDEMN : 44
I decline to respond to emails that contain the phrase "please advise."
  • ABSOLVE : 159
  • CONDEMN : 38
I was once told by a Project Manager: 'You haven't really got the time to be creative, but we have to deliver something highly creative'!!
  • ABSOLVE : 159
  • CONDEMN : 9
My boss has no idea what I do, but he's an expert at it none the less.
  • ABSOLVE : 159
  • CONDEMN : 0
I'd rather be a broke artist than a graphic designer (15 years). And I am broke as hell, but I sleep well at night.
  • ABSOLVE : 159
  • CONDEMN : 54
The next time I am forced to put a QR code in, I'm linking it to a porn site.
  • ABSOLVE : 159
  • CONDEMN : 8
I secretly call the client the night before the meeting, tell them what they'll be seeing and sell my own work.
  • ABSOLVE : 159
  • CONDEMN : 455
When I see ideas pinned to the wall that I know for a fact are lifted from award books I find the ad, copy it and pin it next to the layout.
  • ABSOLVE : 159
  • CONDEMN : 3
I HATE ALL MY COWORKERS
  • ABSOLVE : 158
  • CONDEMN : 15
I just spent two hours eating a burrito and the job number is 118.
  • ABSOLVE : 158
  • CONDEMN : 15
i worked at Microsoft as a Sr. Product Manager and i think Windows 8 blows badger balls.
  • ABSOLVE : 158
  • CONDEMN : 14
As a professional designer, I have no idea how to make things "pretty"
  • ABSOLVE : 158
  • CONDEMN : 16
I've read every post on here.
  • ABSOLVE : 158
  • CONDEMN : 15
If any of the interns are walking at me as I walk down the hallway, I purposefully try to make eye contact with them the entire time to make them uncomfortable.
  • ABSOLVE : 158
  • CONDEMN : 31
I think some ads that won awards are overrated.
  • ABSOLVE : 158
  • CONDEMN : 4
The Swedes will always be more creative and more attractive than us.
  • ABSOLVE : 158
  • CONDEMN : 86
At every place I temp'd, I'd steal every font, premium wordpress theme and high res stock photo that would fit on my portable hard drive.
  • ABSOLVE : 158
  • CONDEMN : 16
One time during a big pitch I had to work while suffering from the flu. When everyone left I licked the CDs' and ECD's mouse. Wait, I don't regret that at all. Please condemn...
  • ABSOLVE : 157
  • CONDEMN